Hogsmeade

In Charms class I learn accio, the spell that pulls objects (and enemies) to me. One of my classmates is Natty, a girl from Uganda whose mother is the new Divination Professor. Natty, in Griffindor, is kind and adventurous.

We learn levioso, the spell that floats objects (and enemies), in Defense Against the Dark Arts class. I duel another classmate, Sebastian, in front of everyone. From Slytherin, Sebastian is a rule-breaker who’s also helpful and curious.

Using accio to play Summoner’s Court, a rare and delightful mini-game.

The houses don’t segregate as they do in the Potter books. Students mingle without making favorites. None of the rivalry exists (possibly because the game decided to avoid quidditch). Playing as a moustache-twirling Slytherin isn’t possible. Our student character can do a few selfish things, but nothing that would count as going to the dark side. (It’s one of the game’s weaknesses.) However, the game does use our perception of Slytherin as evil. We keep waiting for Sebastian to do something nasty. He’s not completely nice — he’s the person who teaches us the Unforgivable Curses — but he never stabs us in the back.

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Portkey to Gringotts

Flying over the quidditch pitch in the fresh morning airsomeday

Hogwarts Legacy (2023) is an absolute blast of a video game. It was so successful upon release that a sequel is in development. HBO is shooting a Harry Potter reboot series of the books. It’s a good time to like the Potterverse.

One of Legacy’s strengths is how it combines the expected lore we all know with a fresh story. The plot has nothing to do with Potter and takes place years prior — the late Victorian era — to the books.

Our character begins as a fifth year student who’s attending Hogwarts for the first time.

ONE

On a street in London I and Professor Fig, who’s quickly teaching me what I’ve missed for four years, load a carriage and prepare to travel to Hogwarts. 

TWO

A ministry official, George Osric, apparates in. He’s got news to share with Fig, but not here on the street. The coachman shakes the reins of invisible steeds and we fly away.

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UNCUT GEMS

A lot of content nowadays is generated just to trash on someone else’s creativity. The worse a show is, the more people will make a video about it. It’s not my intent to be that person. My Enneagram reviews of unsuccessful shows are because I hope to find an answer. Usually it’s because I love the content and am disappointed that it failed. I believe that a great Story Enneagram structure will lead to a great movie. 

Sometimes, though, a subjective reaction will overcome the objective reality of a solid Enneagram.

From my unused files, a case in point:

I can’t say I enjoyed Uncut Gems, 2019. This is a well-crafted movie, heavy with intentions. The filmmakers knew what they wanted to do. No, my dislike comes from the character and plot. Again, well-acted. I just don’t want to watch this protagonist. I don’t really care about his drama. He’s repugnant. I’m pretty sure this is what everyone was aiming for and they succeeded. Hat tip to them, and please never put this movie in front of me again.

LEFTOVER NINE

The movie opens in Ethiopia, 2010, as if it were a Raiders or Jurassic Park franchise. Locals work a gem mine under hazardous conditions. A man with a wounded, bleeding leg is pulled from a cave-in. The crowd is restless, angry. Miners still underground chip out a rock loaded with gems (or a single gem peeking through the layers). It’s shiny.

ONE

We dive into the gem. Colors, music, the kaleidoscope — it’s like an outer space nebula. This is a very particular shot. This gem — The Rock — is like Sauron’s Ring. It plays a protagonist of sorts, a force with an impact on agency. You could even say it has a magical influence. All of this is suggested in this shot.

Then the gem interior cross fades seamlessly into a colon interior. (Yes. I know.) Howard is undergoing a colonoscopy. Afterwards, the credits run as we follow him forward with his day. It’s New York City, 2012, Howard runs a sketchy jewelry store, and disorder emanates from him like a noxious gas. Even for the city, he’s loud and brash.

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Five Year Anniversary

Happy Fourth of July, and Happy Anniversary to me! Looking back at my first posts is hilarious. Here’s the category listing for the month of July 2020. It runs for seven pages! Hahaha! Wow, I was a lunatic. I eventually learned that generating that much content per week was unsustainable.

When people ask what I do with my time and I reply that I create a weekly blog post, it doesn’t sound that impressive. But posting weekly for five years straight is worth celebrating. 

Flying

ONE

Picking up where Episode One of The Good Place left off, Chidi still stresses while Eleanor tries to evade the problem. She calls for Janet. (Actually, Chidi calls for Janet because Eleanor can’t remember the name.)

TWO

First, Eleanor confirms that any conversation with Janet is confidential. Yes, not even Michael can access it. Then she asks Janet for bee-striped clothes.

At the town meeting in Tahani’s palace, everyone wears the same fabric. Michael, with false confidence, tells them all that he has no idea how the chaos happened. 

THREE

And then Tahani’s normal clothes return as the bee-striped outfit fades away.

Roll credits.

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Everything Is Fine

Although it’s been around for nearly a decade and I’ve rewatched it multiple times, I’ve never written about The Good Place. I’ll be very surprised if the episodes, especially in Season One, don’t have a tight Story Enneagram. Let’s make sure, though. Any excuse to have a good laugh is worth taking.

ONE

Eleanor Shellstrop opens her eyes. She’s in a generic waiting room and the wall opposite her shows the chirpy message: Welcome! Everything is fine.

(I won’t jump ahead with spoilers, but be warned that each episode rolls out information. Once you know the season’s ending, the rewatches — especially the ironic touches — become even more delightful. We can talk about that at the Season One overview.)

Michael, the manager, takes her into his office and informs her that she’s dead. She was killed by a column of shopping carts that swept her into traffic. Now, Eleanor’s in the Good Place.

Roll credits.

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BRAX, THREE?

In flashbacks of The Accountant we know that protagonist Wolff has a younger brother but we don’t know what became of him. For quite a while we only see Wolff. Eventually we realize that the man set against Wolff is his brother, who’s given the non-descript name of Brax. It’s an intriguing Eight moment when they recognize each other. And now we know that the sequel will feature the brothers together prominently, as almost a buddy comedy, or so it sounds. Therefore it’s important to look at him in the first movie.

Brax is an assassin. How he ended up in this job is not explained. He’s also slightly too enthusiastic about the chase. I would not say that Brax is psychotic. However, he’s not breaking his own moral code to do the work.

So, does assassin line up with a particular Enneagram?

I immediately gravitate toward a Body Type. All we see of him, from child to adult, is physical aggression.

But I want to say he’s a Heart Type. He’s become an accomplished fighter in order to defend his brother. In the flashbacks we see how much the father depends on Brax to protect Christian. His dad can send him into a fight like he would a dog. As a child, Brax acts from loyalty; as an adult, no one holds his leash.

I’m not sure that this movie gives us enough on Brax to identify which of the Heart Types he would be. We’ll need to wait for more information. Two, Three, or Four? I’m going to lean toward Three, just because he’s so competent. He’s always had a confidence. Let’s put a question mark on it, though, and revisit his character after watching the sequel.

UPDATE: Brax is a Four.

In The Accountant 2, a film I cannot recommend, Brax shows the emotional volatility of the other Heart Type number.

Galaxy Quest (1999)

Happy Ship Weekend! As I’ve mentioned elsewhere, our personal family holiday originated when the Pirates of the Caribbean movies released annually on Memorial Day weekend. Before each new installment, we would watch the previous film to build enthusiasm. Eventually we branched out to other tall ship stories. When we included Disney’s Treasure Planet, it seemed appropriate to diversify into a wider definition of ships. Now Ship Weekend includes air ships, space ships, and fishing boats. If we’re in the mood we’ll stretch the definition all the way down to the tiniest ship possible, the surfboard. The best movies combine our ship holiday with the official memorial for the fallen. Battleship and submarine stories are wonderful. However, the grandaddy is Master and Commander. It’s a near-perfect film. Maybe next year I’ll take a look at it. Until then, I have a holiday-appropriate Story Enneagram review that’s been sitting in my completed folder for a while.

ONE

Heroic music and a television’s aspect ratio introduce a show called “Galaxy Quest.” A clip from an episode plays, showing us the crew and tone. Catch phrases are spoken. “Activate the Omega-13”, with dramatic music, transitions into a “to be continued” screen. 

We’re at a fan convention. Cosplayers applaud. An enthusiastic host (Guy) prepares to announce the actors from the show.

Cut to the green room where, in costume, they all wait. Everyone except the Commander. As they complain, we meet their characters. These actors have had this very conversation innumerable times. When Jason finally enters, everyone’s dislike of him is evident.

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