ROBIN HOOD (2010), NINE

Much to my surprise I liked this version of the Hood story very much. This is no Errol Flynn Robin, though. Not only is the fantasy-level wearing of tights not here, but the world feels more gritty and realistic. Also, the historical telling of King John and the negotiations around the Magna Carta are not often portrayed. I love stuff like that.

This Robin is honorable. He will return a dead man’s sword because he gave his word, even though no one would know if he reneged. He’s honest. Richard asks for his opinion and Robin gives it, regardless of the consequences of displeasing the monarch. He also has an interesting belief in fate. When he’s asked to pretend to be Marion’s husband, he agrees because this is where events have led him. It may not be a wise choice, but he has a trust in providence.

Of course he’s physically capable. On Crusade he’s an archer. At home he wields a sword. Does this mean he’s a Body Type? Not necessarily. A yeoman had to be competent in weapons. The focus of this Robin is more on his integrity. We must believe that Marion would come to trust him over a short period of time. What Enneagram number can sell sincerity?

Eh — he’s probably a Nine. He’s physically comfortable, beyond what a medieval soldier would feel. He’s a diplomat, gathering many friends (as Robin Hood does). He’s a fair judge, as a Nine can be. In his own way, as a poor man serving under a king, he is a philosopher, a seeker of truth. This is why others trust him. Crowe plays Robin with an interesting depth, but ultimately it’s the same archetype, the same Enneagram build as Errol Flynn gave us.

Good flick.

CHARLES BINGLEY, NINE

He’s not an Envy person, that’s for sure. Darcy would drive him crazy if he were. And he’s quite content to take advice from Darcy, sometimes without engaging his own feelings or thoughts. 

He’s the most easygoing person on the planet. As Mr. Bennet says to Jane, “You are each of you so complying, that nothing will ever be resolved on; so easy, that every servant will cheat you; and so generous, that you will always exceed your income.”

So, who is this pleasant, placid man? Head Type or Body?

He really isn’t a thinker in the mold of a Five or Six. Seven, possibly. He has no consciousness of money, obviously, so he’s no One. Not an Eight! Oh, that’s funny. I’d like to see some version of Bingley who tells Darcy to stuff it, but that wouldn’t be Austen.

His ability to avoid conflict leads me toward Nine. His willingness to party leads me toward Seven. Heh.

His modesty is of no help whatsoever. In some ways it keeps him from having a defining personality trait. He doesn’t break forward with a fault or a strength. He’s just the nice lad who goes where he’s told.

Nine. Although a Seven can blow with the wind, they also seek new experiences. Bingley has no appetite for grand adventure. A quiet life and amiable friends are enough to satisfy.

JANE BENNET, TWO

She’s so modest she damages her own prospects, or at least according to Charlotte Lucas. She’s handsome enough to win Darcy’s opprobrium and too beautiful for even Caroline Bingley to feel jealousy. When her heart is broken she rallies herself by keeping busy and thinking well of others.

What Enneagram number is a saint?

Just kidding. We can all be saints! Jane, though, is truly good. Is that a character trait that points to a number? 

Well, not a Body Type. Exercise is not something she seeks. Of course she’s Heart, the best kind of Heart. Her empathy for others seems like it must indicate a Heart Type. She’s a thinking person, but she’s not a Head Type.

She’s a Two. Women Two, such as (probably) Marilyn Monroe, have a sweetness that make them beautiful beyond their physical blessings. She seems almost inhuman, but then her vulnerability comes through. Bingley has hurt Jane deeply, but she keeps it inside. A Two should move to Four in strength and ask for some of what’s due her. She won’t, though.

If she’d been more forward, more demonstrative, when she first met Bingley he might have proposed then. We’d lose an entire plot line if that happened, though! Austen has created the perfect Jane: a generous person who thinks the best of everyone while completely not thinking of herself. Two.

CHARLOTTE LUCAS, SEVEN

I should immediately admit that I’m sympathetic to Charlotte. Elizabeth hates her pragmatism when it comes to love and marriage. I kind of respect Charlotte’s reasoned and harsh perspective.

Of course, she’s stuck with Collins, which is an ill fate. But, her parents! She’s a financial burden with no prospects. God, I really admire her grit.

So, what Enneagram number is so unromantic? Well, a One. A Seven. Possibly a Three. An Eight. Is Charlotte a Body Type?

She’s a Seven! Wow, I’m wonderfully surprised. Like Collins, every portrayal of her has been a different number than what she is. Imagine a Seven, the Enneagram number most associated with hedonism, as an undesirable, unmarriageable Regency woman. What a lot of possibilities for character portrayal!

She and Elizabeth have that Head Type connection as the basis of their friendship.

Seven Women are so practical, so efficient. This is how Charlotte can marry someone she can’t respect and yet live a good life. The house is segregated by Charlotte into her private parlor and his garden and office. It’s not personal, it’s business. (Charlotte would make a great mafia don.)

Yes, some aspects of her life are sub-optimal, but look at the positives. She runs her own household and she likes it. Her position and income (her nest) are secure. When she has children they will be safe and healthy.

It’s utterly unromantic, but it’s not the worst. Like I said, I don’t condemn her. Charlotte’s a boss.

WILLIAM COLLINS, TWO

Although I love the screen portrayals of Mr. Collins, I’m interested that in the novel he’s described as tall and more physically present. He’s not diminutive. The kind of cringy or bantam-like behavior I associate with him all come from the actors. 

He’s always obsequious, of course. The little attentions to the ladies, studied and prepared, is one of his ridiculous traits.

Let’s take Austen’s description as an Enneagram indicator, though. Forget about the actors. Collins is large. My first instincts — a One or a Six — are not correct. If he’s athletic, he’s a Nine. If not, he’s a Two. And he’s not athletic, regardless of how often Charlotte encourages him to enjoy his garden.

I would dearly love to see a production of P&P that casts Mr. Collins as a large Two. How does his character change? That mix of empathy and envy, how does it play out? When he comes to the Bennets after Lydia’s fall — always a scene that doesn’t quite work — how does it play if he’s a Two moving to Eight (weakness) at that moment? Or perhaps he’s a Two moving to Four (strength), looking out for himself and his own? Right now he’s portrayed as a judgmental placeholder, a mouthpiece for Lady Catherine. What if he expresses his own interests in that scene? Ooh, so exciting!

Isn’t that funny? Collins is beloved. I clap when I see him ooze onto the screen. But they’ve all been playing him wrong, and it’s deeply thrilling to imagine a production that gets him right. He doesn’t collect musical instruments or obscure tools, he collects Lady Catherine’s advice. Her attentions are the objects this Man Two places on his hobby shelf. It’s absolutely delightful.

LYDIA BENNET, EIGHT

Is she an Eight? That’s what immediately pops in my head.

She’s so outspoken. Social embarrassment and decorum are not part of her character. In Austen’s world this makes Lydia clownish and prone to ruin. In our world she might be hailed as a confident woman, even an iconoclast. I can see an Eight fitting into either description, depending on the context.

Obviously she’s physical. She loves to dance. Austen presents this as part of Lydia’s boychasing, shallow temperament, but what if she’s just a Body Type who enjoys movement? I can imagine that an Eight, especially the baby of the family who’s been spoiled, would have a hard time meshing with the strictures of Austen’s Regency society.

Lydia’s the hero of her own story. To her delight she moves into society at a young age, finds many dances and beaux, travels away from home with a dear friend, and meets her future husband after much adventure. It’s very Eight-ish to be oblivious to the worries of rules-oriented people (such as her sister Elizabeth, the Six).

She loves her dear Wickham. He’s charming, witty, and handsome. For someone as cognizant of social rules as Wickham, though, Lydia must be a painful companion. Her vivacity will only go so far. When Austen linked them together, I believe she was punishing Wickham in devious ways. He grew up on Pemberley, associating with lordly people. For him, to be forever tied to Lydia — whose freshness would not be welcome in that era — is a come-down.

GEORGE WICKHAM, FOUR

His moment in the spotlight is the one part of Pride and Prejudice that I hardly want to read or watch anymore. The sparkle of his character rubbed off long ago.

Regardless, to judge his Enneagram number I must think back to when his ruse was tolerable to me. His charm, his ability to redirect, is an important aspect of his character. His ability to see weakness is the key. Elizabeth wants to hear a story that impugns Darcy, and Wickham delivers it to her. She wants to believe that Darcy is a villain, and Wickham is ready to serve it up.

On a side note, isn’t it interesting that Wickham is never played by an above-the-line actor? In Bridget Jones’ Diary he completely is. Hugh Grant, A-lister. I barely remember the Wickham of the other versions. Productions cut corners on the Wickham salary. It’s annoying, actually, and partly why I’m uninterested to delve into his Enneagram.

In the book, Wickham’s problem is that he makes Lizzy look a fool. She’s our heroine; we don’t want to see her fall. Her pride (or is it prejudice?) allows her to trust a con artist.

A con artist. As a last resort he becomes a soldier. He has no other prospects for a profession. He thought he might be a lawyer or clergyman, and blew away his path to those careers. He’s not physical and he’s not erudite. He’s a Heart Type.

He’s a Four.

He can’t be a Three, he’s too much of a failure. And he can’t be a Two. He’s too nasty for it.

He can charm the socks off of everyone. Four. It’s all about what he wants and why he’s not getting it. Four. And it’s all about tomorrow. Put off the failures and problems of today, and they’ll probably resolve themselves on a new day. (And they do, mostly.)

FITZWILLIAM DARCY, FIVE

Mr. Darcy. Colin Firth is in the most popular version of Pride and Prejudice, but other versions are just as good. Matthew Macfadyen plays a wonderful Darcy. Don’t forget that Laurence Olivier himself played Darcy. What do these portrayals have in common?

Handsome men with snooty faces. Heh heh.

It’s been so very long since I’ve seen the Olivier version. 1940’s Hollywood was happy to truncate the story and turn it into a bedroom drama. I don’t really recommend it. However, Olivier’s Darcy is a much happier man than I would’ve expected. Eyes twinkle, if you can believe it. He’s very much an aristocrat still. Some people are naturally beneath him. However, he doesn’t have that reticent temperament that Firth and Macfadyen give Darcy. They are socially shy and, therefore, awkward.

So, what have these two actors, in their own personal ways, tapped into? Their Darcys are unique and similar. When Darcy begins to value Elizabeth, he becomes emotionally generous to her. She can do no wrong. His heart is not given immediately, though. He’s cautious and not impulsive. I think we can say quite definitively that Darcy is no Heart Type.

He’s Head, of course. A Body Type would join a country dance, regardless of social stigma. And he’s no Seven. He just isn’t fun enough for that.

We have Five, which I guessed him to be, and Six, which is what I’ve guessed Mark Darcy of Bridget Jones’ Diary to be. 

Fitzwilliam’s character gets to write his letter when Elizabeth rejects his proposal. Mark decides his heart more by consulting his gut: he just knows that Bridget is a good person. Fitzwilliam must use analysis. Even after the pain of Elizabeth’s refusal, he still won’t admit he’s harmed Jane. He can’t see the facts of such an error. Both numbers will weigh right and wrong, but a Five will reason the problem to death. His letter is an example of that process.

MARK DARCY, SIX

What a good sport Colin Firth is. Not only is he playing the same character twice, once as sincere and once as a derivation, but since his version of Pride and Prejudice is so beloved, he’s also playing a reaction to himself. How complicated! He’s a spoof played absolutely straight and with charm. Well done.

Bridget was nothing like Elizabeth. Darcy, though, besides sharing the name reflects many character traits, too. He’s aloof, successful, and a “catch”, to put it in old school terminology. At first he’s portrayed in a bad light, and then his character is revealed to be excellent.

So, if Fitzwilliam Darcy is a Five, what is Mark?

This Darcy is not judgmental. He likes Bridget “just as she is”. When Bridget’s birthday dinner falls apart, Darcy jumps in and whips up an omelette. He’s handy, and isn’t too stuffy to help. He’s a bit pushed around by Natasha, though. All of these traits are the opposite of Fitzwilliam. I’d say this Darcy is not a Five. (My goodness, I should officially look at our P&P Darcy just to make sure about this!)

He’s a Six.

The world is clearly very black and white to Mark. His legal case is righteous. Cleaver’s behavior with his wife is unforgivable.

Hahaha! I just thought of the reindeer jumper. How Six-ish to be completely unselfconscious while wearing a hideously ugly garment.

Bridget, possibly because of the paddling pool incident, is classified in Mark’s view as okay, even though she takes questionable actions. She’s been filed and catalogued, and that’s where she lives.

I don’t feel one hundred per cent sure of this call. I keep getting distracted by Firth’s real life build — decidedly un-Six. He’s plausible, though, and we’ll leave it at that.

DANIEL CLEAVER, NINE

He’s the Wickham, so we know he’s charming and utterly deceitful. (I haven’t done Wickham yet! Holy cow, what am I thinking?) The casting of Hugh Grant leans in to the whole picture of a rascal who ends up being a rake. (I believe those are the proper Regency period-specific terms.)

So, what Enneagram is this version of Wickham? Cleaver is successful. He mentions that the Americans have come because the publishing house is in financial trouble, but we don’t see signs of hardship. It could just be one of his ruses, I don’t know. Unlike Wickham, Cleaver is not going to end in wrack and ruin. He’s a plain working stiff, moderately successful and fully employable.

Cleaver doesn’t really excel at anything. He’s not even a particularly great villain! He’s handsome and socially comfortable, and that’s all he needs to get through life.

Oh, gawd, he’s a Nine.

With Bridget as a Four, this makes perfect sense. The Four/Nine combo are drawn to each other, but they are more toxic than supportive.

I’ll officially delve into Wickham later, but I feel quite certain he won’t end up being a Nine.