He’s a young man in our fishing village. I think he’s supposed to be sympathetic because of his yearning to explore. However, he ends up crashed out on the ground, depleted, in a rather pitiful display of ineptitude.
First he’s outside the village gates, nearby at the shore. After, he’s down the lane outside of the Encampment. Finally, he’s inside the Witchwood, barely across the threshold. Each time he says, “Sorry,” and then goes even further. It’s a very unheroic journey.
We chase him around, though, because it’s worth it later. We’re not done with Valmiro, the lad with a drop-shoulder peasant shirt and a fishing pole.
We’re wandering. I have a portcrystal, something I can drop at almost any location I find on the map, and thereafter I can fast travel to it. If I want I can pick it up and use it elsewhere. These things are the BEST.
On the town notice board are escort quests. Someone wants to go somewhere, usually someplace dangerously far away. The easiest way to do these quests is to have gone there by ourselves already and drop a portcrystal. Boom — take the quest, greet the traveller, zip to the location, and clock the completion.
This is why we’re wandering. I know that Quina will have an escort quest, and I know her travel isn’t random like most of these quests are. I’m headed to the Abbey to drop my purple stone.
Quina’s already there, dressed in nun robes. Dangit. Her escort request would’ve been on the village notice board, and I didn’t check there. At least, that’s what I think. We’ve missed whatever she would’ve said about her reasons to go to the Abbey.
Sorry.
She gives a “tee-hee” and says everyone’s talking about the Arisen.
Now that it’s too late for Quina, I go to the village. Valmiro, a local fishing lad, is missing. He is prone to mad quests, apparently, and we’re to find him.
Also, one last little surprise: as I manage inventory at the inn, Pablos chats about Gran Soren guards and how drunk they are. If the dragon brings trouble, he would “sooner turn to sisters of The Faith for protection”. Quina’s Abbey quest takes on more meaning. She’s in the robes, right? She’s become a postulate of some sort.
This game can be very particular about timing and order of quests. I’m sure it won’t be the first story moment I miss.
The French narrator establishes Mrs. Puff’s Boating School. Fish students drool and sleep while Spongebob takes diligent notes.
TWO
But, wait. It’s time to pick the Hall Monitor of the day. Spongebob looks up with wide eyes.
THREE
Mrs. Puff looks over her checklist. With a mark next to nearly every name, only one student hasn’t been Hall Monitor. Haha, you know whose name remains.
We go into the fahncy part of town. Ser Maximilian, Captain of the Wyrm Hunt is ready to show us four possible quests. I just grab the first in the list: Decipher a Text. He hands me a slate with old writing. Only a couple of words are understandable. “Arisen” is in there, as is “heart”. It’s obviously about us. We’re to run around town and ask for more info.
The guild building is the “gate to the Everfall”. This means nothing to us right now, but — spoiler — whoo, boy. Head Pawn Barnaby tells us it’s “a place of great importance to our kind”. For me, it’s just the next destination in the quest line-up.
When we agree to help Barnaby he takes us down the stairs to a gated doorway. Pawns are “keepers to the entrance”. Since the dragon’s coming the Everfall has a strange aura, a presence that should be investigated. That’s where we come in!
Establishing shot of the Krusty Krab. Inside, Squidward reads a rehearsed greeting and prepares to take the customer fish’s order. The fish’s indecision annoys Squid. (Of course it does lol!)
TWO
The Krabby Patty order is finally passed back to the kitchen where Spongebob waits.
THREE
We see a medium shot of Spongebob building the “Crying Johnny” (with extra onions). Each ingredient and layer is shown like a tutorial.
FOUR
Cooked, the order is passed back through the window for Squidward to deliver. And the line stretches on . . . We definitely get the sense of a busy day in the fast food business.
A large fish approaches the register. His order is complex, loaded with the kind of slang Spongebob has been using. Squidward, naturally, is annoyed.
Spongebob has it cooked already and ready to serve. Then he recognizes the orderer: Bubblebass. They square-off while Western movie music plays over. Spongebob has a reputation for cooking, Bubble for picky eating.
He takes his burger and sits, all of the restaurant gathered to watch. He sniffs, he weighs, he squeezes, he shuffles the burger like a deck of cards. He bites. He chews. (Ew, dude.)
How is it? Pretty good, but . . .
Dunh-dunh. You forgot the pickles!! The crowd gasps.
We escort Mercedes and the verrrry slow wagon carrying the hydra head to the capital city of Gran Soren. Kill or dodge a few wolves, some harpies, goblins here and there, even falling rocks. I’ve learned all the tricks for keeping the ox alive. Mercedes’ mission opens up access to the larger world and the city. This is the hub of everything, and the furthering of the story.
My Pawn, Ada, wears the fabulous yellow diaper pants as we approach Gran Soren.
She immediately abandons us, though, as if she’ll take credit with the Duke for the hydra kill. That touch of passive-aggressive envy we sensed earlier in her character comes out again here.
Watchtowers at the Encampment were destroyed by the hydra. People are still here wandering around — Reynard and Madeleine, too — but this is now a location that’s served its purpose. We leave.
Immediately outside the gate a villager stops us. “Is Quina not with you?” She went off to look for a cure for our wounds, and now she’s missing. All the Pawns tell me I should ask at the village, so down the lane we go.
The Chief, back home, tells us his daughter is gone to the Witchwood. She’s all alone in an eerie place. Can we find her?
This is one of those episodes we always remember. The introduction of the Kyoshi Warriors is a beloved moment.
ONE
We start with Zuko on his ship. Hilariously, he — the angriest person in the show — meditates peacefully at a candle-lit altar. We know it won’t last long. Uncle Iroh pops in, disturbing Zuko, to tell him the Avatar is nowhere to be found. Zuko reacts and fire erupts from the altar. Multiple sightings have been reported, but nothing certain. Zuko says the Avatar is a master of evasive maneuvers.
TWO
Jump cut, and you know exactly where this is going. It’s funny! Team Avatar looks at a map and their crisscross journey. They have no idea where they’re going. It’s the punchline to the One, but it’s also the Trouble. Their haphazard travels, purposeless beyond meeting Aang’s bucket list, are not something the Avatar can safely do. He needs to focus on his mission. This Two (and its Eight) help clarify that tension.
Daytime in the village and a peddler, Madeleine, would like us to escort her to the Encampment. She’s in a tavern-wench dress, bosom popping out the top, and has an oily, flattering manner. She seems completely untrustworthy, but a quest is a quest.
