Episode Enneagrams – Page 9 – Enneagram and Encaustic

Neptune’s Spatula

ONE

Heroic gladiator music over the credits is replaced by our friendly uke with a bubble-wipe to the Fry Cook Museum.

In walk Spongebob and Patrick. (He wears a large ballcap and has a camera around his neck.) They ooh and aah at the displays, which are mostly creatures in glass cases wearing chef hats.

And then they arrive at the “ultimate cooking utensil”, the Golden Spatula. Ah. Larry the Lobster climbs a staircase behind the display in order to try — a la Excalibur — to pull the spatula from its bucket of — suds? wash water? mashed potatoes? He fails, and the spatula goes “Sproing.”

(Haha. It’s a bucket of “ancient grease”. While the gladiator music plays.)

TWO

Only a fry cook worthy of King Neptune himself . . . haha. We’re just waiting for it now. Too cute. Spongebob wants a picture next to the spatula, his hand lightly resting on the handle. An old lady fish interrupts Patrick asking for directions. While he drools with uncertainty, Spongebob valiantly offers to help. Pointing the way, he wields the spatula. Schwing! Golden fire surrounds the liberated, upraised tool. A swirly cloud surrounds Spongebob while Patrick, oblivious, still tries to take a picture.

THREE

Lightning. Fish gathering around. A voice from the cloud. Through a break we see a Mount Olympus-style tableau, and Neptune swims down and through. (His voice this time is J. Peterman from Seinfeld. In the movie it’s George Bluth from Arrested Development.)

The Story Enneagram of Reacher, Season 1

Notice when the story can be summarized by a simple sentence. Subject-verb-object. I’ve written basically a treatment of the show. It’s not meant to be thrilling, but it is meant to demonstrate concise beats. Any beat that is hard to condense is a red flag.

“WELCOME TO MARGRAVE”

ONE

Joe is killed.

Reacher is introduced.

He’s arrested while trying to eat pie.

TWO

Introduce Roscoe and Finlay at the station.

Background on Reacher; he shows off his detecting abilities.

Flashback: introduce Young Reacher.

Introduce Paul Hubble and the black sedan.

Hubble confesses. He and Reacher are sent to prison.

Spivey locks them in with the lifers.

Hubble tells Reacher the truth. He’s a currency manager for someone who will nail him to a wall.

Fight in the bathroom.

Pie

Lol, I haven’t even started watching, but I love the episode already from its title. The problem introduced at the very beginning of the season — will Reacher get to eat a piece of that delicious peach pie — promises resolution here.

LEFTOVER NINE

Ah, lovely. We pick up exactly where we left off, with KJ pointing a gun at Finlay’s head. Reacher submits to Teale disarming him. Picard explains himself to Finlay.

ONE

Reacher asks about Roscoe, and KJ holds up a phone video of her, hands tied over her head. Teale agrees that they’ll all die except the Hubbles. The townspeople don’t like to see an innocent family killed. Well, no. KJ intends to torture Paul Hubble. He’s the last loose end.

Unintimidated, Reacher tells how much he knows about the Venezuelans. Pretty soon they’ll come for KJ and give him the “same necktie” they gave his daddy.

KJ responds, “I killed my father.” (YIKES. Reacher looks a little gobsmacked, too, lol.)

And now we know, as does Reacher, that KJ is batshit evil. We get a little proud monologuing as KJ claims responsibility for all of it. Holy crap, the long list of murders ends with, “I killed your brother.” Lol, take a beat on Reacher’s reaction to that.

(The casting of KJ is excellent, because all we want to see is Reacher decimate that little toad. And we know from his face here that KJ’s a dead man.)

Teale, just a low-level scumbag, sums up the plan. The Reacher brothers were working together with a bad cop (Finlay), or at least that’s how they’ll make it look to the community.

TWO

And now the threats and exposition are over and the story begins. KJ demands that Reacher use his tracking skills to find Hubble. If he doesn’t call by the morning, the Hubble women and Roscoe will die in unimaginably horrible ways.

Hold on Reacher’s face. Roll credits.

The Story Enneagram of the Mass Effect Trilogy

The Catalyst docks with the Crucible over a war-ravaged Earth

This is my granddaddy review of the entire gaming trilogy. It’s been a lot of fun (and a little bit of frustration) to play through it all again. If the plot is too long to read, I hope you’ll jump to my Critical Notes at the end

ONE

We meet Shepard and the Normandy. Humans are a new addition to the galaxy civilization, which includes multiple races. Geth, though, are an AI race that most of the worlds have never seen in person. We learn about the universe’s elite special forces group just in time to meet our ME1 villain, a rogue Spectre named Saren.

TWO

The First Beacon overwhelms Shepard and implants a vision in her brain. At this point she doesn’t know what it means, only that something bad happened. War, destruction. Later we look back and realize this is the first warning about the Reapers, delivered by the Protheans, a doomed race that was wiped out.

Reacher Said Nothing

ONE

A house exterior at night. Inside, Officer Stevenson prepares for bed with his wife. They discuss their distress and the difficulty he’s having with the case. Finlay won’t talk to him. The Hubbles (their cousins, right?) won’t answer the phone. She suggests they move away from Margrave, especially as they’ll need a babysitter soon. They’re happy and cuddly about her early pregnancy.

TWO

As they kiss, the camera cuts to a view looking out the window at a black car pulling up. Ominous music. White booted feet and hazmat-suited legs exit the vehicle. One of the four men carries a crowbar. Roll credits.

THREE

An establishing shot of the Atlanta airport runway. Cut to a slow pan of Reacher, starting at his boots and ending at his face above a “stupid” NYC tourist T-shirt. He frowns. (Of course, lol.) Someone wheeling a carry-on calls for a taxi, and Reacher focuses in on the luggage for some reason.

Ah, cut to a flashback. Young Reacher wrangles a bag as he and Joe leave the house. The family is moving to Germany, and the boys consider it a punishment. Mom, with her French accent, gives them a pep talk. Reacher, with the strength of three boys your age, what will you do, she asks. You’re going to do what’s right. The close-up of Young Reacher’s thoughtful face becomes present day Reacher. Finlay screeches up in the POS minivan.

The Story Enneagram of Mass Effect 3

Jump down to my Critical Notes if you can’t stand one more pass at the plot, lol.

ONE

The Reapers land on Earth. We knew it was coming, but it’s worse than we ever imagined.

TWO

The Boy doesn’t escape in the shuttle, which is destroyed. All of the Mars mission is included in this section: Finding the ultimate Prothean device. (Using it — the Crucible — is the key to the Eight.)

THREE

Dream One

Papier

ONE

Close-up on Finlay’s wedding ring as he spins it on a picnic table. Reacher explains to him that the gang they’re working against is Venezuelan. Kliner Sr.’s neck wound is a signature move of theirs, a “butterfly cut”. Insert a cell photo of the dead man, just to remind us how the last episode ended.

TWO

They thought Kliner was the boss, but now they know they’re dealing with someone bigger who doesn’t like how messy this Margrave situation has become. Reacher wants a stakeout to see how the change in leadership will effect Kliner Industries. They’ll need a car no one will recognize. Reacher’s on it, while Finlay is called back to the station house. The “dung” — as Finlay euphemizes — has hit the fan.

Roll credits.

At the station, Chief Teale directs the officers. Stevenson is to look at footage of the road leading to Kliner’s. When Finlay enters, Teale rushes over to get him on the case. (Finlay pretends to not know any details about the crime scene.)

THREE

As Finlay prepares to head out, Kliner Jr. comes into the station swinging for him. Finlay sidesteps and locks his arm. KJ, furious that Finlay suspected his father, calls him a carpetbagger and spits at his feet. Teale sends KJ into his office, then tells Finlay that he should stand down from the case. “Hit the bench and I’ll call you back in the game soon enough.”

Boy

Shepard reaches for the Citadel console, even though she sees no other button to press, and collapses before she can solve the problem. That’s when the floor panel she lies on rises up and ascends.

She’s lifted to a new area, and there he is. It’s Boy, limned as a transparent computer construct. He chastises her. He’s in charge, the one who directs the Reapers to harvest mature civilizations. It’s the only way to save organic life. Eventually every species will reach a point where synthetic life will threaten them. Before all organics are killed, the Catalyst — Boy — looses the Reapers. Mature species are processed to become new Reapers. Immature species are left alone to develop over the next 50,000 years.

(Talk about an exposition dump!)

Assault on London

The galaxy throws everything at Earth as Shepard prepares to shuttle down to London. Before landing, Joker rises from his pilot’s chair and salutes us. It’s a pause in the story that feels like a key beat.

Then we’re on the ground. It’s a good battle that turns absolutely hellacious as we fire up missiles to take out the Reaper blocking the street ahead.

The Reapers are sending humans up to the Citadel via this conduit, a giant light beam. It’s our only way in, as the Citadel arms are closed.

Most of this is straightforward endgame. Teammates have tender goodbyes, fighting is at its most difficult, and the prospects are very grim. Shepard holds it together, encouraging soldiers that we’ll win, but this is a dark ruin of a future.

And then things get weird.

The Third Dream and The Catalyst

Chasing after Kai Leng and the Illusive Man, Shepard finds Sanctuary, a world devoted to taking refugees. However, it’s a false front. Cerberus is using the humans for experiments on Reaper indoctrination, turning people into husks. Miranda’s father leads the research. He does discover a way to reverse engineer the process, so that he thinks he can command Reapers. Kai Leng escapes with the data and returns to the Illusive Man. Because Miranda’s planted a tracker on Leng, he leads Shepard and the Alliance to Cerberus’ doorstep.

Admiral Hackett goes for a final check-in: once the fleet makes a move on the Illusive Man, the Reapers will become aware. The Crucible is ready except for the Catalyst. Everyone hopes that the Illusive Man knows what it is and how to implement it. Otherwise, humanity battles Reapers over Earth as, probably, a last stand. Shepard gives the go-ahead.

Immediately, we’re back in the molasses realm, chasing that Boy.

Shepard in armor watches as Boy runs into the arms of Shepard in casual wear. They all gaze at each other. Shepard awakens in bed wearing her underwear. (This is the point where Shepard becomes intimate with anyone she romanced. I just couldn’t work up the energy to care, although I’ve pursued all the options in the past.)

And then we’re on Cronos Station, the Illusive Man’s base.

It’s a straightforward fight into the center to recover the Prothean VI. Along the way we see the giant skeleton Reaper from the Collector base. Apparently the Illusive Man retrieved it. It’s just hanging there in tatters.