KATY, EIGHT

Who is this fabulous Shang-Chi goddess, lol? Awkwafina brings good-natured humor, compassion, loyalty, and grit to the role. (When she starts singing “Hotel California” at a thug on a skyscraper ledge, rip.) At first we think of her as a good egg and a comedic relief sidekick. That archery, though! I didn’t expect her to become a superhero partner.

So let’s take the archery seriously. Let’s say it’s not just a gimmick (Give the lively comedienne a pointy prop!) but a physical gift that surprises her, an inherent trait. Body Type, right? I have a hard time seeing Heart or Head jumping in and excelling at a complicated athletic discipline. With time and training, yes, but not in a few days’ timespan. (Again, we’re suspending our disbelief and calling the whole Ta Lo adventure plausible.)

She’s too flamboyant to be a Nine, but what about an Eight or a One? Her boldness and ribald humor could indicate either number.

I’m going to say Eight. I love the idea that the superhero Eight, an overworked and tired trope, is refreshed here by Katy’s unique perspective. Also, an Eight can hide their athleticism more than a One can. A One is an Energizer bunny, and that’s not our Katy.

The Citadel

We dock at a flying city, the Citadel. It’s the hub of galactic civilization, the home of the Council. (The Galaxy Council? The Universe Council? Three races represent the three Council seats and humans aren’t one of them.)

We’re here to complain about Saren and ask that the Council revoke his Spectre status. Instead, Saren deflects any blame and makes us look like whiny babies. We’ll need more proof to convince the Council.

Mostly we’re here to introduce ourselves to the world-building. All the races have ambassadors here, so we meet Elcor (the elephantine creatures who tell you their feelings aloud with no passion), the Volus (small, round creatures who breathe through a mask apparatus and work back-end finance deals), the Hanar (pink jelly tentacle creatures who speak in the third person), and, of course, the powerful Asari (blue-skinned women who live a long time), and the lizard-like and super-brainy Salarians. Turian, Asari, and Salarian are the Council members.

We have the opportunity to load up on side missions that basically deliver flavor and immersion. It works, but the fighting is at a minimum, which can get boring.

BLACK WIDOW, ONE

Poor Natasha. Even in her own movie she’s basically a sidekick. The closest we get to specific character traits is in Endgame when she tries to keep the team and the world post-Blip together. Her willingness to run a radio base and contact station in the midst of chaos is one of her most interesting moments.

Otherwise, Natasha is a competent assassin with a monstrous origin story. All credit to Johansson for giving humor and stoicism to a one-dimensional character.

So who is this Black Widow? All of the girls in the program are trained physically. Can she claim a Body Type, or is every Widow forced into excellence? Let’s say no, and see where that takes us. She longs for community, yet keeps herself apart as someone undeserving of friendship and intimacy. Child Natasha is written as an Eight, the way she fights for her sister against soldiers and authority. It never felt right, though, because adult Natasha isn’t an Eight. Wait, is she a One?

Ah, of course. Her wit, her fast-paced fighting style, and her moral code (“there’s red in my ledger”) all point to One. This is why her movie isn’t good. The showrunners went dark. With a One, the tone needs to go light. A One’s quickness, their cleverness and problem-solving optimism, would shine more in an Antman-style format. Natasha’s so focused I can see why they went in the direction they did, but it was a mistake. The beauty of a One is the surprise: they’re physically dedicated and morally serious, yet they’ll come up with the sharpest jokes and insights. Natasha is given these gifts in movies like Winter Soldier, yet they forgot about them during her own project. Oh, man, that’s sad.

Zuko Alone

We have a problem, lol. See my Critical Notes after the breakdown.

ONE

We see Zuko riding his ostrich-horse across a ravine bridge in a desertscape. (The Western theme is set right away.) His stomach rumbles as he smells meat cooking. Grasping his knife, he considers killing the man tending the fire.

THREE

The man turns to attend to his pregnant wife. (This is a couple we will see again in a later episode.) Zuko continues on, drinking the last of his water.

TWO

Now woozy and faint, Zuko dreams of his mother as she walks away from him. 

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HAWKEYE, NULL

The first time we meet him in the MCU he’s co-opted by Loki and brain-manipulated into a villainous henchman. Bad choice! He becomes likable in later movies, but he’ll always have the taint, our memory, of the evil version of him.

(Why do so many movies remove a character’s free will? I hate that kind of lazy writing, but that’s another topic, lol.)

Later we learn that Clint has a family. He ends up as the most normal superhero in the series. When we finally spend time with him in his own show we see he’s dogged, dutiful, and honorable. His family disappeared in the Blip and he lost it, turning rogue. He’s really just a dedicated dad and husband who can shoot arrows.

Actually, I think he’s written all over the place. Early on, he’s not a character at all, just a plot point. He’s the Avenger with no back story. Even his eponymous series is more about the young woman who will team with him than it is about him. I want to call him a Null, a character the writers didn’t develop with enough consistency to fit into an Enneagram identity. Does he pull it out at the end in Hawkeye? He has the trooper qualities of a Six, although he’s much too physically fearless for that. He has the recklessness of a Nine in trouble.

No. I refuse to examine a character who’s been in multiple properties yet only begins to develop at the end. He’s important enough to deserve a fully-fleshed personality, and I find it disrespectful to the character that they did not give him that. A Hawkeye written with integrity helps the showrunners craft a better story and gives Renner more foundation for a better performance. Someone this haphazard is a Null.

The Beacon

There’s nothing we can do for Nihlus. A dockworker saw the whole thing and tells us about this other Turian, Saren. On we go, fighting our way to the spaceport and the Beacon. However, Saren’s there first.

A cut scene shows Saren approach the Beacon and get caught in its beam. He leaves before we can arrive.

After we clear the landing area, we’re alone with the Beacon. Kaidan, curious, approaches. It tries to grab him in its beam. I knock him aside and end up caught in the beam myself. Visions of Geth and destruction are shown to me until I pass out and collapse. When I awaken, I’m back on the Normandy. Kaidan and Ashley brought me in. Doc clears me for duty. I really don’t want to tell anyone about my dreams — they sound so childish and unspecific — but we’re on our way to the Citadel to report our experience to the Council.

Meanwhile, in a cut scene, we see Saren on his ship (that threatening claw from earlier). He has an associate, The Matriarch, who discusses me, the Normandy, and my superior, Captain Anderson. That I’ve accessed the Beacon makes Saren . . .

. . . unhappy.

MANTIS, TWO

She’s an empath with the ability to calm minds. She’s also a bit of a slave, or someone too frightened to leave a powerful boss. We like her, especially after Drax calls her ugly. She isn’t, although her eyes are unsettling, and she’s so wounded by his casual honesty that we sympathize.

I jump immediately to Two. Her social concern for others, her ability to sense their feelings, is like a Heart Type superpower. I’m also led, though, by her pain. A Two in weakness will not stand up for themselves. Their gentleness can lead to them becoming victims, especially of bullies like Ego. She breaks my heart she’s so vulnerable and open. I hope Marvel gives her more than a cursory character treatment.

Eden Prime

One of my crew, a young and enthusiastic lad, is killed immediately. As Kaidan and I continue on mission, we find another soldier, Ashley, fighting frantically to save herself. The enemy? Geth, a synthetic AI species created by the Quarians. 

One of the great trash mobs in gaming, the Geth are deeply unsettling.

They rebelled, driving their makers into exile, and then disappeared behind the Perseus Veil (great name, no idea what it means) 200 years ago. Their backstory doesn’t really matter. because they’re here to impale humans on metal spikes and turn them into zombie-like husks.

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YONDU UDONTA, FOUR

Tough love! We don’t completely understand until the second Guardians how much Yondu loves Peter and looks on him as a son. It’s a great roll-out. Yondu doesn’t arc, but our understanding of his character does. He is quite consistent.

He’s not gentle, though. No coddling. The whole “the crew wanted to eat you at first” bit seems slightly villainous. Only after he repeats it do we understand that this is just a gag. Yondu’s sense of humor is dry and biting. He’s not a cuddly fellow. And why should he love Peter? He has a job to deliver a human kid to a godlike being. There’s something gentle and quiet in Yondu that makes him break from the job and raise Peter himself.

Again, all of this depth is only revealed over two movies.

So, who is this lovable ravager? He’s not a Body Type. His weapon asks no physical capabilities from him beyond the ability to whistle. He’s a thinker, but he doesn’t dwell there. What he enjoys is to mess with your mind. Think of the scene in the store where he mumbles gobbledy gook at the orb-buyer to manipulate him. Yondu gets a kick out of the show. Heart Type.

Hahaha! He collects little cute action figures for his dashboard. Does that indicate he’s a Two? Hilarious! No, I think he’s a Four because of his acerbic humor. He thrives on the battle of wits. When Peter replaces the infinity stone with a troll doll, Yondu loves it. His protege tricked him, and he thinks that’s wonderful. He’s a gamesman, and personality quirks are his playfield. And no one must ever know how tender he is under that rough blue exterior.

MASS-ive Undertaking

I’d like to try looking at the Story Enneagram of another game, and the grandaddy awaits, Mass Effect. Can I do it? I bought myself the Legendary Edition, all three games, and I haven’t played in years, so I have a tiny feeling of freshness and a large feeling of nostalgia. The minute that menu music started playing, I teared up. This and Dragon Age were my first RPGs. Let’s try!

Backstory begins. We’re told that humans in the year 2148 discovered alien ruins on Mars that jumped our space-faring civilization forward. We now have the plans — I think? — to build a relay machine, the Mass Effect. Yet, the universe and many alien races already use this technology, so Mass Effect relays are spread about the cosmos.

My little, tiny ship flies into the glowing ball of the Mass Effect relay and shoots out across the universe like a bullet from a barrel
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