Category: Christmas

GEORGE BAILEY, SEVEN

When I was younger I couldn’t stand to watch George beaten down by life and denied his dreams. Duty keeps him from adventure. Self-sacrifice locks him at home while his brother pursues the world. From a certain perspective this is a very painful story.

What kind of a man takes a job he hates in order to fulfill his father’s promises, marries a woman he loves although she prefers a lifestyle that repulses him, and turns to thoughts of suicide when life wearies him, as all life does?

I’m immediately distracted by tall, lanky Jimmy Stewart, who fits a specific body build. Is George a Four or a Five? I doubt it. He’s not funny enough or contemplative enough for either.

Is George a Seven? Someone who dreams big is more heartbreaking than a practical man. A One, a Three — these heroes would bring a completely different, more encouraging story. Not a Six; a Six expects to be disappointed by life. Not a Two; George sees his house as a millstone rather than a quirky mansion.

Seven, Eight, or Nine? He does save his brother’s life on the ice. Any of these numbers could accomplish this. In every other way he shows no aptitude for physical activity, so I’ll say he’s not a Body Type.

Seven it is. What other number could wish for something more, be the kind of person who could achieve steamer-trunk adventures, and yet honors his commitments? His heroism is quiet, the kind that real men can attain, but it makes for depressing storytelling.

Scrooge, page 36

A beat, and then a gentle GLOW begins to emanate from the
crack in the bed-curtains.


Soft SOUNDS begin, as well. Shuffling, blowing, swishing,
lowing. Nervous, Scrooge reaches for the curtains. Smells
assault his senses, stopping him.


A CRY, part newborn baby, part enraged animal, rings through
the apartment and Scrooge jumps back into his bed.

GENTLE VOICE
(OVER)
Ebenezer Scrooge. Come to me now.

Meek, Scrooge draws the bed-curtains and steps out.

Continue reading “Scrooge, page 36”

YUKON CORNELIUS, EIGHT

The tongue, right? Tasting his thrown axe for that sweet gold ore.

He’s so jolly! (Hey, Skinny Santa, this is how you do it.) His little doggos and his cheer, his adventurous spirit and his easygoing acceptance — who doesn’t love Yukon? He’s a little bit of a mentor, a wise man, for Rudolph and Hermey. He’s a loner, after all, and he knows how to find peace and contentment in the wild.

Who is this bearded Mountain Man?

He has gadgets and friends, a sled loaded with paraphernalia, and an open and welcoming personality. Society is an odd match for him — square peg, round hole — and his heart, when given, is 100% yours. Two?

No, wait! He’s an Eight (who moves to Two in strength). Look at that robust torso! He’s so aggressive and confident around the Abominable. And who else would tame the beast? Too funny. Only an Eight would create a very Humble Bumble.

Didn’t you just love him when you were a child? He’s brash and comfortable. But that tongue thing — and somehow tasting weird things is an Eight quality, who knew? — was always a little too far.

SKINNY SANTA, ONE

That moment when you see Santa — Santa Claus! — tell Rudolph he’s not good enough because of a physical difference you’re devastated. THIS IS THE SANTA! He’s all good, all loving (like God) and all forgiving. Why is this Santa so petty and mean?

Usually Santa is more of an avatar. This Santa is a character. Let’s pursue his Enneagram number.

Well, and I’m cracking up, this Santa is hungry. Or, he’s not hungry. He’s just an ascetic, which is totally wrong for a Santa. Mrs. Claus says, “Eat, papa, eat. No one likes a skinny Santa.”

WHY ISN’T SANTA ROLY POLY? Everything about this version is . . . Not Santa. Every year, according to this story, Santa lives lean until the last couple of weeks when he overeats. This is a very conflicted, eating-disordered Santa.

One. I mean, I go immediately to One. Skinny, energetic Santa who only gives in to the requirement of his job at the last minute is a One. Santa who tsks at Rudolph’s nose because it’s not up to some random standard that Santa himself made out of whole cloth is a One. And when he must grovel to Rudolph and ask for his help, he does it with dignity. One.

Also, the Pole is super efficient. One.

Scrooge, page 21

Next to Boy Scrooge is a figure in exotic garments, an axe in
his belt, and leading a wood-laden donkey.

ALI BABA

Ready to look for hidden treasure,
young Master Ebenezer?

REVERSE to Scrooge. His delight causes Past to stop and
stare.

SCROOGE

And Robinson Crusoe! My imaginary
friends were a comfort to me. I had
forgotten!

ROBINSON CRUSOE, with a parrot on his shoulder, kneels down
to look Boy Scrooge in the eye.

Continue reading “Scrooge, page 21”

HERMEY, SIX

“I want to be . . . a dentist.” After years of watching Hermey I accept his reality, but think about how weird this was the first time you heard it. The North Pole and dentistry seem so unrelated. Sweets and Santa, though: the writer’s thought process is clever. Of course the land of sugar has tooth decay. I’m impressed.

You’ve written an outcast, someone as misplaced as Rudolph. That’s lovely. And he’s a good egg, a solid friend. And when they must go against the Abominable, Hermey is brave (oink oink) and competent. He’s also very resolute. The Head Elf is stern and intimidating, yet Hermey sticks to his guns.

Great character! What is he?

A Six. This is why he and Rudolph are a good partnership. The world is black and white to Hermey. He could go along to get along. The elf gig is good. His principles, though, his determination, won’t let him acquiesce. Also, his bravery is tied to helping his friends. A Six is so loyal that their natural fear will be put aside if someone needs them.

RUDOLPH, NINE

Now we’re really getting Christmas-y!

He’s so sweet-natured he breaks your heart. Even 50 years ago when this movie first came out, his dad Donner and Santa struck us as cruel. His nose is odd so he’s socially rejected. Talk about an underdog story!

Rudolph is quite non-judgmental, possibly because he has been judged so harshly by others. Another possibility is that he is naturally kind. He makes friends easily with those outside of the reindeer competitive milieu. And when he befriends someone, he fights for them. Clarice against the Abominable, the Misfit Toys . . . he’s as loyal as you could wish.

He can really fly. He’s the best at the tryouts. Does this mean Body Type? His kindness — his sense that cruelty is wrong and he won’t engage in it — has been leading me toward Six. He certainly isn’t an Eight. He’s much too resigned with the injustice of the workshop. And he’s not a One. That quick wit and energy are missing.

Another Nine? Yes. It’s the refusal to engage in conflict, the running away. He lives in Six, his weakness number, until finding his strength. It’s the Harry Potter and T’Challa motif again. Soft-hearted hero keeps us waiting for a lot of the story, and then they bring the power. We know all along that the payoff will be great. He leads the sleigh team! Everyone who was mean to him apologizes and admits their mistake. Justice. That’s how you make a classic.